its here its here!!!

CELINE RESORT '10 DESIGNED BY PHOEBE PHILO. It's so..sharp! It's the only resort collection i have seen thus far that doesn't look like it has been used to mop up the tears of soot covered orphans/investment bankers. In some images the rigidness of the fabric becomes almost 2D. The collection actually excites me about fashion again (sorry couture week). Also, they smartly included the shoes and bags in the look book images because people are likely going to be dying to get ahold of those. Like me. NEED!

"NOTHING IS MORE GLAMOUROUS THAN A BEEF SANDWICH"

THIS IS WHY I NEED MY OWN CABLE ACCESS TV SHOW! Right now. AS I TYPE! A show called 'Sandwiches You Will Like' is on and is interviewing a man with a trachea voxbox about why he likes the spicy tripe sandwich. An hour, devoted only to sandwiches that you WILL, not might, WILL, like. So far, I like none of the sandwiches, but my palette is not refined enough for spicy tripe,bbq pig ear, or egg foo young with mayo on white bread.

Thank god for public access, PBS, CET, and their like. No jillion dollar NYC Prep episode could comepare to this or make for as wet and wild of a drinking game-drink everytime the narrator says DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-(whisper)licious or mentions offal. I am running out of beer.

Secrets Show is coming your way...as soon as I get bunny to help me film and deceive others for entertainment. In my dreams...

UPDATE: I totally thought this show was a rerun from about 1996 judging from fashions/hairstyles...NOPE! They are just only visiting those static parts of the country. Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives can eat Brain (sandwich.)The towns also look like every episode of COPS ever, throw in some Joey Greco and I am in cable heaven! Fingers Crossed!

papa bear baby bear

vice has an interview with Walter Van Beirendonck (1/(antwerp)6).

Van B sez on sezzy bears: "It’s not just “bears,” actually. There are a lot of different types. If you’re in the scene, there are the grizzlies—the dark ones—and the cubs—the young ones. There are also otters. But it’s also a very positive scene. It’s not about drugs. It’s not about aggression. It’s not only about sex. There are cuddly sides to it that I like—stuff like reunions, where everyone’s just eating and drinking and talking. It’s a nice vibe."

so! not only is Van Beirendonck mentor to the spastic fantastic Bernard Wilhelm BUT he is a fan of rituals and bears!The interview also inclines info about Van Beirendonck casting moddle bears for his next show, dressing Robin Williams, and S&M.

I am in fantasy gay brain bear love.

book lernin

Jez's Anna N (the grande dame) writes on a WSJ piece regarding what appears to be the spate of dark YA novellas (wintergirls, if i stay, hunger games are cited) and makes great assertations in response to the OG WSJ. What neither article touches on however, is that teens today, on the whole are BUYING TRUCK LOADS OF SHIT all by themselves. Not to mention, are a viable market for despondent, weepy, crushing paperbacks that mirror the tumultuous vortex of suck called 'being a teen'.

When I was a teen, I had no income source of my own and had to get clearance to buy anything off the internet from my mom and use her card, meaning, i could not buy half, nay 1/32, the illicit shit i was reading/pining for. Au contraire, ma souer, has her own job, her own cash account, her own computer, and frankly more money in her checking account than yours truely. If i had those means at that age my bookshelf would be far more stacked and the Appalachian county library wouldn't have been half as creeped out by my requests.

Both articles point out that there is nothing wrong with writing/posing novels to teens with what an adult my perceive as risque material and both point out that teens aren't idiots; they know that shit sucks, why wouldn't they, they are teens. I am just glad that (a) more compelling books are being put on the market (i'll fucking read the shit out of wintergirls) and (b) that those lay-about kids are readin' at all.

SO WHAT SO WHAT SO FINE

i was (so what so what) so kindly visually compared to the hottest les-tres-biens in telepathe on friday. dieeeee. this vid is so decadent! break ins! marshmellows! killer dance moves! jezuz crips i hope they come to a town/bedroom near me!

http://www.myspace.com/telepathe

OMG WANT

hussein chalayan X puma

neeeedddd deeez; right after i sell my cats to citi card in exchange for them to increase my credit.

ZOMG food network ILU

So, in the midst of reading all of the depressing fashion sales/retro-growth figures, FoodTV pops up on my ancient television with some choice suggestions. Now, this will not solve buyers anxiety over the upcoming fall retail season (even though, surprise, black and somber is a BIG trend), but it's the best advice iteration I have seen thus far in our 'difficult' economy. Chef and Tv personality, Tyler Florence, (better to look at than listen to) appears in what looks like Rachel Ray's pretend kitchen to tell you the tastiest way to re-heat your cheap ass take out food. GENIUS! Who the fuck is watching Good Eats on a tuesday night, probs someone who is familiar with the creative arts of consuming leftovers. Am I paying attention when Barefoot Contessa-or as someone I know lovingly calls her,"...idk..that barefoot bitch"-makes Shrimp Bisque and a pear tarte tatin? Hardly. Quickly insert a commercial-torial on how to re-heat leftover pizza and lo-mein with out compromising the original's already dubious quality? I see you showtime! This little heads up re-connects with the viewer, here, it's my lazy ass, and under lines that FoodTv is as helpful and relevent as ever. Oh, tight, and now Ted Allen is on Foodtv talkin about how asparagus makes your pee smell! (it contains mercaptan which is also present in rotting eggs) Now, I need a snack!

Elle Yeah!

By now I have underlined my growing distaste for W multi-fold along with other general women's mag nonsense and trivia. Although, do not fret, you know what is getting pretty fresh? American Elle. British and French Elle have always had it on lock, but now lady liberty's version is slinkin' around lookin fly and being a good read. I nabbed some copies from the library down the block, intending to distractedly leaf through them during bubble baths or whilst wrapped in a fluffy robe. Well, I haven't had a bubble bath since I was 8 and found myself ignoring other pressing issues, like feeding the cat, to genuinely read the glossy tomes. They've got fashion! and beauty! and food! and, best of all, BOOKS! They've got it all, from Margiela to Curry rice crispy recipies to tales about how people should just chill the fuck out. Fluffy book suggestions and snarky book suggestions; I'm a sucker for literacy. Nonsense jewels and every day jewels. Deconstruction of runway looks and none of that 'how to dress your shape' shit. No condescending stories about the agony of having to miss a vay-cay in Mustique because it would gauche considering the economic state of our states. I may or may not have ripped a few pages from the loaned leaves; the same cannot be said for the Vogue and Harper's Bazaar issues I also dragged home. Perhaps Elle has always been this good and I am an idiot for not realizing it's beauty sooner, if so, I promise to treat you right, and even buy my own issues as opposed to mangling the kind copies offered by library boyfriend.

so much cake its like its ma birfday

birthdays, romantic holidays, heated arguments, and all other times requiring consoling by material goods are ideal for patron saint coin pendants. st. sartre. st. jack. st. grandmaster flash. protect your neck and remind yourself that causing fights to solely to get jewelry is tacky. instead be on your best behaviour and hope someone gives you this epic iosselliani ring one day. one ring being a blue eye-d serpent eating its own tail, a symbol of infinity and the other a delicate sapphire

omgomgomomgmomg best news of the year

ACNE IS COMING/IN THE US!!!!! Acne studio opens in NYC soonish and i am crying and vomiting from despair that i cannot get there and that i am so fucking excited to have what is easily my favorite brand closer to me! The studio will sell mens and womens clothes and accessories and soon! furniture and small industrial goods,a childrens line, and men's and women's underwear. now i can really spiral into crippling debt. whatever ill eat beanie weenies and drink schlitz if that allows me to have everything they offer ever.

warm my heart

short pointed posts today. little exclamation points if you will. illustrator elizabeth moch rocks my world with her soft doodly pencil portraits. this particular illustrator is from interview magazine; another favorite item of mine.

summer lovin

chris benz ss08 is so slinky and effortless. i said it before and ill say it again. now that the sun is finally shining and the air is still cool in the mornings i only want to be easy breezy.

friday the thirteenth style

maybe it's the two feet of snow outside. maybe it's cabin fever. but i am getting into looking like a possessed wood nymph/friday the 13th 70s style axe murderess for next fall. also. long wavy hair? give it to me. (i'm taking prenatal vitamins to make my locks grow to rapunzel like lengths; i'll let you know how it turns out.) (photos: fall 08 Boy by Band of Outsiders; super chic, smart, and cool)

vitamin d injection

i have worn gray/black for the past two weeks straight. come onnnn color, texture, sunshine, and warm weather! i want these looks then i wanna hampster out. (l-r: etro; just cavalli; pucci; matthew williamson) wtfcavalliyousay?s/s08 was choice in small doses.
fyi:both pucci, matthew williamson, (and preen) are designed by matthew williamson. who! had prince play at his namesake labels show. jealousssss.

crayon physics deluxe

kitsune noir posted about a game that won the Best Game at the Independent Games Festival and earned a $20,000 prize. I want this game for my DS so bad. Read about it, watch it, its calming and inspiring.

reverse buyers remorse

isabel marant is an iconic french brand. the brand is cult-ier than the Heaven's Gate pack and its followers are just about as fanatical. her clothes are better than the fanciest of kool-aids and much more insouciant than black nikes. the styling is classic french gamine, but each piece is a stand out on its own. the garments are sized as 0,1,2,3...(a type of one size fits all small,medium,large set-up) and are effortlessly drapey and slouchy, but with a real weight that is comforting to wear. if only i had the common sense to buy it when i had the luxury of being around it everyday. i've learned my lesson for sure.

also: minor-excitement/partial rant: for s/s08 she included black in her color palette which is often not done, but really should be and is much appreciated by yours truly. no one, especially no one in fashion/design, is going to abandon black. i don't care if nytimes, vogue, elle, or whomever decrees it too somber. i don't care if the earth turns into a giant moon bounce with free kittens and $100,000 dollar bills for every one; people will still choose to wear black. so good. i am even more psyched that she includes black and dark neutrals as much as i do in my own wardrobe. that only gives me more reason to collect it all.

no reservations

After watching this Anthony Bourdain show on the travel channel (you can watch the rest of the show on YouTube; the part above is where Anthony goes to eat at the 1$ buffet and introduces that he will be cooked for by royalty later in the show) and coupling it with my adoration of Wes Anderson's fantasy portrayal of this country in The Darjeeling Limited, I need to go to India. You can stay in these palace hotels, really, its cool. Also, Indian food: I need it. Not to say I am ignorant of the incredible amounts of people and the rampant poverty in India, I just feel like its a better place to aspire to visit than, you know, HelL-A, or Miami wit my gurrliezz. (Also due to the above factors it is no wonder that brands are pushing Indian Styling for spring. It's beautiful and fresh)

fashion week fall/winter 08 part 2

so, NY fashion week is coming along and there is a lot more boring nonsense. matronly frocks, pants so wide even the Ukranian models look obese, knee length everything, excessive bows and brocades, and other shit that i cannot recall because i dont want to nor do i care to. cathy horyn noted that there is a surplus of embellishment in what should more forwardly be a time of cleaner modernism. clutter of trim and gilt looks tired and old and almost condescending in the face of a recession and following several seasons of more and more is more. though not all of my commentary is scornful or depressed, i pulled the following images which i will personally be adapting as wardrobe direction. you can do what you please, but please, keep your neck bows, frills, and crushed velvet far away from me. (images l-r: benjamin cho, thakoon, karen walker)

fashion week fall/winter 08 part 1

so, youll be impressed, im programming cheats into my TI-83 plus calculator for a test tomorrow, scarfing Aloo Matar, chugging a corona, and snarking all over this weekends fashion shows. oh and watching that millionaire matchmaker show on bravo! Multi tasking to the extreme. Firstly, oh my god this millionare dude is BORING. TO FUCKING DEATH! i mean i know his matchmaker date is a vapid surgically enhanced drone but still! robots have a limit on awkward conversation. oh. thats my girl, draining her booze to make the date less hellish. ok on to the fashion: so BCBG, nicole miller, baby phat, erin fetherston, among others showed over the weekend. and get ready women ages 14-140: shit is gonna suck. medieval flappers nonsense and other grasping at straw trends. erin fetherston grew up a little from coquette into gamine, which is appreciated, but everything else so far is eh bordering on lame**. jezebel comments aptly and comically on the shows so far. whats more exciting is patrick robinson is grand poo-bah of the Gap and shit is lookin tight! please see above photo and this article for patrick's achievements thus far and plans for the american brand.

**alexandre herchcovich is so rad it gets it own post

100th post! all about the inadequacies of this batch of couture shows!

how riveting you say! well get over it, this shit is rubbin' me raw. so, only about 30 women in the world purchase couture, most being from european/middle eastern origin. thus, generally, couture shows are made without profit in mind. if someone wants to commission a $40,000 dress from galliano that's cool, but couture shows most often exist to put the art and whimsy back into fashion. the pure, base, sensual desire for expressing any idea you can think of; shooting for the stars, if you will. it is not practical and it is oft not even wearable without help getting dressed from a friend or two. which is why, this year's offerings were a let down. they were either unimaginative or referentially dated or even both. most veered more towards being, gasp, RTW than couture. yes, chanel showed models in flats ( quelle shoque!) and had them loping out of a giant stone chanel jacket, but the clothes looked more like they belonged on the set of gossip girl than on a museum pedestal. also, i have a problem with models in flats, why make the owners of some of the world's most unique and beautiful collection of genes look like normal women schlepping around? maybe it's to be blase about luxury, but really, those girls just look like the awkward teens they really are, which is disconcerting as i want my RTW models to be inaccessible and the clothes to be irreverently accessible and, therefore, my couture models to look like they are from an entirely different planet with clothes that are made of daydreams, dirty alleyways, and rainbow ponies! mass pictures below, form your own opinions, but mine are:
yawn chanel & lacroix (only because they look dated and done)
chanel:












lacroix:












tiiight: givenchy, dior, and galliano (he dressed coco rocha as a MERMAID! a MERMAID! how perfect is that!?)

givenchy:


dior & coco rocha as galliano's mermaid: